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Today @ 5:00 pm.

Myself and about a thousand other sweaty would-be commuters peering down the track at the 34th Street Stop of the A train.

For 20 minutes. No train.

And then there was one. Only it was the local, E, on the other side of the tracks.

15 more minutes. No train.

And then another train on the local side. This time it was an A.

So along with just 15 others, I darted down the stairs, under and through the tunnel, up the other stairs (bursting through some poor tourists with luggage) to barely squeeze on the train.

Is this the A train?

Yes.

So, let me get this straight MTA: you run the A on the local track, and for some reason don’t announce it?

Yay.

But it gets slightly better.

We run local ’till 59th Street. But then we run express to 125, and then 145. For some unannounced reason. At 145 we pull alongside another A train, which everyone teams into. “Why?” I asked the conductor. “Because that one might leave first.” Then he shrugged.

Very fitting for the MTA. A shrug.

To be honest, I didn’t think I wanted TIVO until I got TIVO.

Or, to be specific, until i got Time Warner Cable’s DVR, which is built into my cable box. But when I got it, I was instantly hooked. It’s everything they said it would be, and more. And although I don’t tape a ton of shows, the ones I do record are near, and dear to my heart.

Did I just say tape? I did.

Anyway, for some reason, this weekend, while I was away, my Time Warner DVD failed miserably to record “Real Time With Bill Maher”, “SNL”, and “At The Movies With Ebert And Roper”.

Wuh?

So I go online… and there’s not much besides some “tips” that are written for morons ala “what’s DVR?”. So I clicked on the “reach us via our ‘online form’” link… which is deader than a virtual doornail:

TimeWarnerCable: Contact Us!

So I call.

Already I’m WAY past my time quotient for dealing with this mess. And I’m on hold for almost ever.

And then… I get a dial tone!

I was cut off!

So I called again, and climbed my way through the phone tree only to get cut off yet again.

Kill.

The problem here is not that I missed my precious shows, and that I cried like a little girl. The problem here is that Time Warner NY has such atrocious customer service that I don’t even know HOW to go about reporting this, or somehow asking for their help in fixing it.

And that’s one of the more important aspects of good customer service, isn’t it? When something goes wrong, in this order you:

1) Make yourself obviously available
2) Etc

So…I must ask, ever so nicely:

Time Warner New York? WTF?